Wednesday, October 31 1:17 p.m. An officer met with a women on upper H Street who explained that a female prostitute had stolen $390,000 from her bank account by using “bank codes” – a technique the larcenous harlot had learned from a police officer, and could be heard talking about it from her apartment upstairs (in the one-story building), which is accessible only through a secret passage located behind the building. She showed officers a cable hanging behind the building which, when turned right, opens the secret passage. Police speculated that there might be a mental health issue involved with the report.
These Arcata Eye police logs are the funniest things I've read in a while.
I gather from a conversation with Seebs that there's more where this comes from, which means I'm not the first person to think police logs would make a great humor blog.
Ah well, more time for me to do my ACTUAL work.
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Dude! I live near Arcata, 15 miles in fact! It's a total hippie/artist university town. Quite a riot to walk through every once in a while. Has the most draconian city council ever! (In the plaza, in the middle of town where there are benches to sit on, it IS ILLEGAL TO SIT IN THE BENCHES.) If you want more police reports, watch the Humboldt Beacon as well. It's the local newspaper of Fortuna, which is another 15 miles in the OTHER direction, and a complete 180 from Arcata. My favorite police report they had from down there was some old guy got shitfaced, stole a riding lawnmower, then was riding up and down the main drag of the town with a bottle of beer holding up traffic and screaming at people in their cars. Police cars were driving along side of him trying to get him to pull over, while he continued to scream at them and everyone else around him. :-D
ReplyDeleteCampus blotters on universities from the security people were often like that as well. The best one from my days was, "Student reported seeing a bright light in the sky. It was the moon."
ReplyDelete"(In the plaza, in the middle of town where there are benches to sit on, it IS ILLEGAL TO SIT IN THE BENCHES.)"
ReplyDeleteWell, that's not factual at all. Look at the Plaza Cam any day ad you will see people enjoying themselves on the Plaza benches and lawn.
http://www.arcataplazacam.com/
And thanks for liking the Police Log.
Thank you for your work, Mr. Hoover! You have a mighty fine publication there.
ReplyDelete"Well, that's not factual at all. Look at the Plaza Cam any day ad you will see people enjoying themselves on the Plaza benches and lawn."
ReplyDeleteReally?! Sadly, that's not what I was told. Knew I should have fact checked that first. *shakes head* I thought it was awfully strange that a law like would be enacted when it seemed like the city wanted people to enjoy the Plaza. Thanks for calling me on it. :)