Ron Ejaculated. Harry Opened His Mouth And Swallowed.

Harry Potter Audiobooks 1-6: REMIXED



I can't stop giggling. Somebody fucking stab me.

This one's better, though. Can't embed it, so CLICKY!

Shit Fit

I was walking the Captain earlier, and he decided to take a dump on somebody's verge. I picked it all up nice and neat, then placed the bag in a trash bin that was waiting on the curb for pickup.

This screechy voice came out of nowhere, yelling "HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY!!!!" Which is funny, because in the Far Side, "Woof" is "HEY!" in Doginese.

I turned around, and there was this unfortunate-looking blonde lady in the window of the house whose trash it must have been. "WHAT. IS. THAT?"

"Dog poop. I just picked it up." and I showed her my scooper for good measure.

The next thing she said was unintelligible due to pitch and tempo issues, but it was probably something like "Blah blah blah how dare you throw your dirty bag of dog poop on top of my perfectly clean garbage! I spent real time on all those stinky maxi pads, and now you've come along and ruined everything! What will the trash men think? Blah!"

I said "Well, I could throw it somewhere else, but it's already down there. Sorry."

She kept on raving at me. I can only assume she wanted me to take the dog poop out of her trash can and deposit it somewhere else more appropriate (like her mudpit yard, perhaps).

At that point I realized she was basically barking like a territory-crazed yard dog, and there was really nothing else I could say. I disengaged by replacing my headphones in my ears and walking away while she was still going on.

Good gracious, all that fuss over a baggie full of dogshit. No wonder everyone in this town just leaves it wherever it drops.

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape!

Update Post

Updated the comic right on time for once.

While I was working, I finished listening to Harry Potter Book 7. Think I'm gonna read it again from Book 1 before I make any permanent judgments or join in the inevitable fray of fandom debate, but JK Rowling is pretty much my favorite person on Earth right now.

Just think: If I'd waited for the Amazon copy to arrive instead of canceling the order and going to Target instead, I would still be waiting for the book ...a week from today! Eugh.

Found A Sparkly

I found a crystal-covered rock in a back alley yesterday while walking the Captain. I wanted to take it home with me, but my hands were full and I didn't have anywhere to stash it. Today I took the same route and brought my bag with me, and now I has a sparkly.






Now I need to find a rock shop or ask someone with power tools to grind down the matrix for me, so I can add the piece to my display shelf. I also have no idea what kind of crystals they are.

Blah blah blah Jackie Chan.

The Captain is flopped down on my floor, gnawing loudly on a carrot. When I first showed the carrot to him, he jumped up and walked about on his hind legs for a few seconds out of pure excitement. This is a behavior I'm teaching him to associate with the command "Evolve."

He is coming along pretty well. Last night we went out for dinner because Rah's going to visit family for a couple of weeks, and I left him in his pen with a fully stuffed Kong toy, Mr. Monkey, and Harry Potter on the stereo to keep him company. I felt kind of bad about leaving him like that; he hasn't even read the first 6 books yet.

Came home two hours later to find he had not destroyed the world. Hadn't even pulled any trash out of the bin to tear up, even. He went kind of psychotic and wiggly when we came in, but was at least silent about it. Whatever the books say, I sort of doubt I'll ever be able to convince Dumb-Dumb that comings and goings are no big deal.

I think tonight after my work is done I'll pen him up and hit the gym. It's been a week. Walking him around all of creation as my sole form of exercise is a pretty interesting experience and affords me a lot of opportunities to see areas of the neighborhood that I ordinarily never encounter, but I miss the free-weights and cardio machines. At least they don't give you sunburn.

PS - Last night I dreamed I circumcised Queen Victoria while she was under sedation for an unrelated surgery. She came after me with the entire force of the Royal Guard, but I escaped into the mountains.

My Water Buffalo

The Captain and I had an adventure at the park today. Then we came home and had another adventure called "Let's shampoo the dog because he rolled in goose shit on the lakeshore!" which the Captain subtitled "AGH RUN AWAY OH GOD THE HUMANS ARE TORTURING ME!"

---

No video or photographs exist of the torture session. Just imagine Guantanamo Bay for dogs and you're pretty much spot-on.

Haha. Spot.

Update Post

Three new pages are up!

I haven't been able to find much time for computer lately due to new puppy. He's over the fear-pee thing (mostly) and is taking well to his routine. He sleeps through the night and has begun switching over from chewing things that don't belong to him to killing the knotted Rag and stuffed Mr. Monkey instead.

He is now reliably performing "sit", and is close to mastering "lay down." He's a bit fuzzy on "pee" but a few more repetitions should transform him into a living, voice-activated sprinkler system.

He's mastered "Not for dogs" and "No, come this way" but is still not coming to me every time I call him. I got some little training kibbles to help condition him to do this, and they're working pretty well so far. He will go in the bathroom and sit in his snuggly kitty bed without balking, but still whines and cries if I pen him in there and leave him alone for ten minutes. I ignore his theatrics; no dog of mine will ever get his way by throwing fits.

We're going to start crate training as soon as I know how big a kennel to get (he's still growing). He loves his vinyl zippy-kennel and will sit contentedly in there playing with his toys for hours if I'm in the room, but he chewed the zipper off after the first time I shut it on him and went to pee. Now it can't be closed anymore at all. Oh, there was heartache when he did that shit. Heartache and bitter apple spray. And then more heartache as he chewed it up again.

He's learning to fetch a ball and give it back for me to throw again. The big projects are confinement training (so I can leave him alone in the house without coming home to any how-could-you-leave-me-alone-with-all-this-furniture-to-tear-up drama) and teaching him to come and get me when he needs to go outside, instead of just pissing on the floor. He'll cut it out midstream and wait til I get the leash if I catch him in the act, bless his brainless little self, but it'll be nice when he at least knows to whimper or go get his leash and communicate his suffering.

He's sleeping a lot due to boredom so today I'm going to rig up a runner line in the yard and play fetch with him. Ten bucks says he ends up wrapped around a tree looking like God just kicked his ass.

In other news, I'm listening to the final Harry Potter book and totally hooked on it. I expect to have finished it by Saturday's update, at which point I can finally read comments and hang out online again. Well, if the Captain leaves me enough free time in between driving me bugshit and being absolutely adorable.

You know, I talk a lot of shit, but there is nothing quite as wonderful as the devotion and affection of a quiet, calm dog. If only I could stop fantasizing about roasting him at a luau, we'd be bestest friends.

SO TIRED WAH BLOOGAH

The Captain has stopped peeing in terror. He has begun barking at odd noises, but I'm working on training that out of him. He has a little kennel-nest and a Kong and a stuffed monkey, and gets walked several times a day. He likes to play catch in the house with a bouncy tennis ball, but hasn't yet mastered the brakes. Wackiness ensues.

I've been sleeping very poorly since I got him, but so far each night has been an improvement. I've got some child gates and use them to pen him in the bathroom when I need to work, so the comic is back underway and I'm doing my best to make up for lost time.

Also, I cancelled my Amazon order for Harry Potter book 7 on CD after noticing that the estimated shipping date is in frickin' AUGUST and the copy at Target was only a few dollars more. Seebs got me it for my birthday present, and the world did rejoice.

Okay, back to work. Wish me luck!

More Dog Info

Captain X is not a dog at all. He is in fact a furry dolphin.

Rah, Jesse and I discovered this to our amusement (and our clothing's detriment) when he took a running leap into Marydale Lake and then didn't want to get out again. He hunkered down and had himself a good long soak in the duckweed, then shook it all off onto me. I expected whale-song for a while there.

It was a tiring walk, so he's chilling out in the bathroom with a dish of water. I've been putting him in there for meals and short confinement sessions since last night, which I think helps him not get overwhelmed as much by the newness of it all.

He likes to sit quietly and people-watch with his back pressed against my leg. Sweet guy.

Now I'll nap and work on the comic. It's gonna be SO late.

Spit Roasted Hoond

I was walking the uberhoond earlier when I started to get really sick and loopy-headed. Thought about it and realized I hadn't eaten since like 3 pm yesterday, when I had the better part of a strawberry waffle. Right before the adoption, basically. Fucker's running me ragged over here.

He hasn't gotten used to the noises people make coming in yet, so when they all got in from the Potter release party (which I slept through) he started fear-peeing, growling, and barking at them. He has a quiet, low-pitched bark. Oh, and the pee was all over the floor. I stepped right in a hidden puddle on my way to the bathroom after proving to him that the dastardly intruders were actually just a couple of late-night book nerds.

He also isn't used to the noises people make when moving around upstairs, so he growls at that, too. No fear-pee for this, but that's probably just because Seebs hasn't been playing DDR lately. Oh, I look forward to how THAT goes.

I am a little concerned that in the entire time I've known him (1 very long walk, 1 medium walk, and 3 short jaunts into the yard) he hasn't answered a call of nature yet. Either he's intimidated by the other dogs in the area, or he's got nothing to spare after the submissive peeing thing.

I'd really like to get the pooing business established as an outdoors-only venue as quickly and cleanly as possible. I'm glad we stocked up on paper towels this month and that the floors can be washed down without too much trouble, but srsly folks.

One thing he does that is driving me insane: he picks up my things and carries them around in his mouth. So far he's liberated five socks from my hamper and carried them to his spot on the floor to caress. He is a high-energy fleabeast and needs interesting and dog-appropriate toys as soon as possible. I've been taking the pilfered undies away and telling him no, which seems to be making an impression, but he is easily bored and in dire need of attention.

And one potentially awful thing--he chewed through his first power cord earlier, before I could catch him at it. The cable wasn't plugged in, but if it had been, he would be one dead luau-pig. I have to go over and bitter-apple spray every power cable he can reach tomorrow.

Oh, but he's a cutie. He follows me from room to room like a baby duck and curls up on the floor next to the couch where I'm sleeping. He needs to be trained to sleep in a crate, though. Such a fearful little fellow would really enjoy being confined and secure at night in a place that's just for him, and it'd make my habit of going on night drives to the gym a lot less troublesome.

Obedience classes are definitely high on my agenda. The sooner he stops being a pain in my ass, the sooner I can stop fantasizing about spit-roasting him Hawaiian style. (Oh god, now I'm hungry for ribs.)

My patience is probably better than a person with a day job and a tight schedule and a busy social life, but there's just so many times I can take seeing him walk around in great pride, with a pair of my undies wedged in his jaws. I don't even like it when girls look at my underwear, and here this guy's practically reached third base with them!

Just now, he's settled down after the long walk and appears to be asleep. If I talk nice to him he rolls over on his back, kicks one leg spastically, and tries to make carpet-angels. Looks like I've finally got time to get back to work on the comic. Tomorrow, if I can get my work done, I might just take him out to Como Park.

I'm thinking of calling him Captain Ruckus. Or maybe Captain Fabulous. Captain SOMETHING, at least.

Hypothetical

I got 1x Fat Lip! I got 1X sore face! I scored 100 points!

How did this happen? YOU CAN BLAME THIS LITTLE BASTARD.



If you can ignore the horribly stained and scarred floor for a moment, you will notice something that looks a bit like a big-eyed puppy in the center of the frame.

Yes, Hypothetical exists. He is currently sleeping on my dirty floor on a clean towel, all tuckered out from a long day of excitement and adoption. He is a pointer mix, four months old and very very timid. He doesn't like loud noises, but is very gentle on a leash and comes immediately when I call him. He doesn't seem to bark, but makes little whuffling noises in his sleep. And the jingling, of course.

He already knows how to sit and stay, which is excellent for starters. He also pees with helpless submission if I scold him too sternly for doing naughty things like carrying my slipper around in his mouth. If I catch him in time, I can redirect his terror. Otherwise, I have to kick around paper towels and spray pet odor stuff.

He also has enormous webbed feets, which is how he managed to clawed shit out of my face on the ride home. He seemed to think there was a ladder to freedom located somewhere on my forehead and it was his sincerest wish to climb out of the car on it. Fate and gravity intervened and he spent the rest of the trip huddled against me, drooling down my arm. I think he'll make a fine driving dog someday.

He learns quickly not to do stupid shit and has begun to grasp the concept of "No" and "Not for dogs!" I haven't got a clue about his poo schedule, though, which is not so great. If there's one smell I hate, it's dogshit. Inevitably gonna have to take care of a few accidents before we get settled in, but I'm looking forward to having it over with. Next step is definitely going to be a bath--dude is most certainly not smelling pine fresh.

Now for the annoying part -- after all this searching, I finally hit on the right dog for me on a fucking Friday, which means I've been cleaning up fear-pee and spraying everything with bitter apple all afternoon instead of finishing the pages for this week. Gawd dammit, I knew SOMETHING would come up to throw the schedule out of whack. It's more of a rule than an exception this year. No worries, I will make it up to you if the pages are late due to Hypothetical-induced Exhaustion factor.

On the bright side, I hear the cats are organizing a lynch mob upstairs. Ooh, this is gonna be FUN!

Remember when MTV was good?

I miss MTV's The State more than just about anything. Except when they had a practically foetal Jon Stewart hosting You Wrote It, You Watch It. I think I might miss that one just a little bit more.

Not A Very Exciting Post, I'm Afraid

My hair is down to my knees and I'm starting to get a bit afraid. My arms are just too damned short to brush all the way to the ends anymore! I think it might be time to look for a new, longer-handled brush, and cross my fingers that it'll be good enough. It was breaking off as fast as it grew for the past ten years before i started taking care of it, and now I'm starting to worry that I'll wind up playing the lead role in the Broadway production of the Peanut Butter Solution.

Using my home-mixed conditioner has an interesting side-effect: it's made my hair rather water-resistant. I was in the shower for ten minutes just letting it saturate to the ends, and everything under the top layer was still bone-dry. I have to kind of skwoosh it to get the water through. I'm like some kind of freakish otter. A freakish, shiny otter.

I'm bored, so it's off to the gym again for me! Then back home to pencil away at the last page of this week's update. It's three pages this week, with a pretty good amount already working toward next week's count. Nice!

STAY OUT OF CAMBERWICK GREEN!

I have this mental image of me by the end of this week: huddled in the corner of a barricaded, soundproofed bomb shelter with my purified water jugs and tins of Spam stacked to the ceiling. No TV, no radio, just me and my shotgun, waiting out the storm. In a moment of hunger, I open a Spam tin. Written on the meat are the words "HARRY POTTER DIES OF AIDS." Nooooooooooo!

It's been very quiet on my end since the quarantine began, but I like the vacation. I've gotten 21 miles of walking/cross-country skiiing done on the hamster-wheel this week, plus lots of weight lifting. Artwise, I've already got a good chunk of this week's pages pencilled and various scribbly sketchbook practice.

Final books in hugely popular series should come out more often!

If you're avoiding spoilers (I know a bunch of you were planning to) then I'd advise you to avoid strangers' conversations and the front pages of major newspapers, too, except the people who like my blog are usually the wild-eyed headphone types anyway, and get all their news from the entrails of slaughtered children. And that's why I like 'em.

This morning, I got back from the gym and discovered my arms and face tasted like a salt-lick. Off to the shower I went, and just for funsies, I put my DS in a ZipLoc and fought random monster encounters while saturating my hair. FF5 may have the weakest story of any FF game I've ever played, but gawddamn if the extreme portability factor doesn't make up for it.

Today I ordered a pair of onigiri molds. Making them by hand is too much for my weak wrists, plus it burns the christ out of my palms. The molds were only 6 bucks on eBay, including shipping. I look forward to trying the results out on my next hike.

There is a cat in my room, chewing on a plastic bag. And they say cats are cleverer than dogs...

PS - Finished watching Life on Mars. Brilliant concept, brilliant story, BRILLIANT ending. The cop drama plots tended to get repetetive and draggy, though, and there were times I wanted to wring the characters' necks for behaving like... tv characters... in order to move the plot along. But do I mark the show down for its minor flaws? Oh hell naw. How can I, when shit like this happens?



Hawkwind and Camberwick Green puppet police brutality. It's like chocolate and slightly more chocolate--a perfect marriage of flavor!

I really don't look forward to finding out what American writers do to this awesome series. I've seen the dude they cast as Sam Tyler and he looks like some kind of underwear model. Yuck.

(Mind you, this is coming from a dude who isn't really into dudes, so YMMV.)

POST MOAR FUCKING CATS

There is something scandalicious and disturbing about those moments when the straight media turns its focus briefly away from the missing white coed of the week, and focuses instead on the shady and untamed territory of Internet culture. Sorry, 'technoculture.'

(Quick note: Am I paranoid for thinking that the same dickcheese hip cat who coined the term 'electronica' probably came up with that one? And that he probably still refers to 'cybersex' as something that takes place on the 'information superhighway?')

I will never forget the day after that CSI episode aired, when several wide-eyed, menopausal coworkers began conversing in the break room about this new group who call themselves "Furries" and have sex in animal costumes because they want to be stuffed toys.

It was the most surreal conversation I had ever had at the library, and that's taking into account the time the children's librarian dressed up as an M&M for Halloween and the library director said he would like her to melt in his mouth.

Ladies and gentlemen, behold the "Lolcats."

I hear next week they'll be doing an article on this fad called "Goatse-ing." See, there's this photograph of a man holding his anus stretched very wide with both hands, and America's s kids have begun showing it to each other in chat rooms for shock value. Be still, my screeching 14.4!

On second thought, I'll sit this one out. Wake me up when Time discovers LemonParty.

Wonders Never Cease

I've been watching Life on Mars while drawing this past couple of days, and I've got one thing to say: HAWKWIND. I grew up on their music, but hearing it in the background of a television show confused the christ out of me for a minute there.

It's definitely a new thing for me to hear a band I like get featured on TV. Oddly enough, they only get played during psychedelic drug trip sequences. Hmmmm....

In other news, Animal Planet had a show the other day with 2NU samples running through the soundtrack. Hell, it might have been his composition for all I know.

These things always go in threes. Today I checked and found that iTunes finally got some Men Without Hats. It's just a best-of compilation, but there were a few songs I'd never heard before and a nice selection of my favorites. If they can just get Rhythm of Youth and Folk of the 80s, I'll be happy as a sad, geeky little clam.

BRING THE BEAT BACK

God damn, I miss the KLF.

More Fun With CNN Headlines

I knew that guy looked shady.

Update Post

Wow, I updated early this week!

Today I must finish my overdue studio orders, then I get the rest of the weekend off. Awesome! I think I'll spend it hiking, rockhounding, and Hypothetical hunting.

PS - Edamame shells are actually pretty tasty.

Let The Master Show You It.

During a break, I made a silly macro animation for use in flame wars. Taught myself to make animated .gifs from video while I was at it, too!

Busy as a Killer Bee

Saw Harry Potter. Long fucking movie, but that's all right. It was better at skipping the trivial stuff than its predecessors in many ways. I thoroughly enjoyed most of it. Luna Lovegood was adorable.

Then I hit the gym for a couple of hours. Didn't lift after all, because my left wrist is still twanging and I didn't want to push it. My new shoes started giving me blisters, so next time I go I'll have to stick some moles on or give the treadmill a rest.

There was only crap on the gym telly, but the place was empty so I turned up the volume and changed the channel every five seconds, looking for gory nature shows or caught-on-tape shit. I was watching the last few minutes of a Bleach episode, but then the network hiccupped and froze on Ichigo's affronted face for the next half hour. Animal Planet was having some stupid marathon cut into five minute segments with ten minutes of commercials in between.

Once I'd completed my 5 1/2 mile hamster wheel adventure, I came home and made sketti for dinner. Next I plan to have a shower, fold some laundry, and work on the comic until bedtime. I may never get laid, but I'm an industrious motherfucker.

PS - I'll be AFK a lot this next couple of weeks. Don't expect me to reply much until after Potterdämmerung. Say hi to the wank for me!

Childfree Stewardess?

Not Really A Fairy Tale

Carrying 227 pounds on her tiny 5'2" frame, the 51-year-old mother and wife could barely squeeze into her plus-size clothing.

...

"I was wearing a size 22 and getting my clothes at stores where the biggest size was a 24. I asked myself, 'Where are you going to buy your clothes after you get bigger than a size 24?'" said Twitchell.

Adding to her misery, Twitchell says her ballooning weight was also wreaking havoc on her 31-year marriage.

"We were literally just co-existing together, like roommates," recalled Twitchell.

"Friends asked my husband to e-mail them a picture of us. Later, I discovered that he had sent them an old photograph taken when I was much smaller. Even though he loved me, he was embarrassed at how much weight I had gained."

Afraid she would have to purchase clothing from online stores catering to larger women, Twitchell told her husband she'd had enough and was ready to make a change.

...

"I have a marriage again," says Twitchell, who recently retired and relocated with her husband from New Jersey to their new home in the mountains of western North Carolina.

"When I finally reached my goal (weight), my wedding ring was two sizes too big. I had already had it resized twice and the jeweler was hesitant that I might lose more weight. Rather than resize it, my husband bought me a new beautiful diamond ring and when he gave it to me he said this was a renewal of our wedding vows," she recalled.

Twitchell says her husband keeps telling people that he's got his wife back. This August, the couple will celebrate their 33rd wedding anniversary and they couldn't be happier.

"If I can lose 110 pounds, anyone can," says Twitchell.

Full Article here.

The tone of this story is disturbing. I'm happy that the lady was able to work hard and become healthier. That's a hell of an accomplishment. However, a person shouldn't have to be a size 2 to be acknowledged by her own husband as the woman he married.

Y helo thar, Fatty Fallacy #3! ("Your gigantic ass is to blame for everything you don't like about your life.")

The way she gushes about winning back her husband and being rewarded with pretty jewelry for getting skinny gives me the creeps. They have some obvious control issues to deal with, but CNN is spinning it like she's Cinderella finally getting to dance with THE Prince Charming.

And honestly, if that's one woman's idea of success, cool. Chase your joy, and all that. But I feel bad for her, and for every woman who reads this kind of condescending trash in hopes that it might hold the secret to living happily ever after.

I Couldn't Help It

This is what happens when they let me near the internet. Feel free to gank! It'll never be more topical than it is right now.

My Timey-Wimey Detector

This makes me cackle every time I watch it. Which is often.

Sketch Dump!

I've posted a bunch of new art here.

Dang. I hadn't realized how productive I was this year until just now.

PS - WOO! Blogger lets me title my posts again!

Post Some Fucking Cats

Yes. Three videos. Because I fucking love cats.

Even the one who just glared at me while defiantly pissing on my bedroom wall.

TACKY TACKY TACKY

You've seen self-mutilation. But have you ever heard of self-mutilation plagiarism?

I'm just boggling over the fact that somebody would photoshop another person's injuries onto herself to turn it into angst-art.

What the fucking hell? There's cutting, and there's cut-and-pasting. They're both tragic, just not in the same way.

EDIT: HEY ANONYMOUS COMMENTERS, I FOUND SOME PICTURES OF YOU ON THE INTERNET!



















OMG TRIGGAR

Update Post

I still don't know what I want to do to celebrate turning 27. Maybe I could go to a rock shop and buy myself something shiny...or to the Humane Society to adopt myself something furry.

Argh, conflicted! And sleepy!

At 1:30 in the morning, somebody started pounding on either my bedroom window or the back door (had stereo on, so I couldn't hear well). They were very insistent, so I ignored them.

Damn, I thought the Crack Fairy had learned to read the 'no begging' signs. :(

Also, my wrist is killing me again. I worked too many hours in a row without resting it. Thank god for this brace.

Teh Agonies

Wrist much much better today, if a bit wrinkly and pale from the brace. I've taken advantage of the improvement and have been working hard on the pages. I intend to have the base colors done by bed-time, and I'll shade and add the dialogue tomorrow.

Complications aside, ooooh how I love doing these super-sized updates.

Oddly, it's a week of computer hassles. Corel keeps trying to paste selections from earlier in the work session, instead of letting me select new areas. And Blogger does not seem to want to allow me to title any of my posts. The field is inactive when I try to click it.

All is well. I am happy.

PS - To everyone who left me encouraging comments while I was nearly tearing my hair out from the depression a few days ago, I wanted to say thank you. It really helped reading them, even though I didn't have the energy to respond at the time.

Internet Party

Holy gods of tendonitis! My left wrist is fucked.

I got a nice soft fleecy metal-reinforced wrist brace and have been wearing it since yesterday evening pretty much nonstop. It helped through most of today but now it's starting to flare up from all the typing, so I have to get off the computer pretty soon. I should have spent the day popping ibuprofen and icing the damn thing. I just didn't expect it to get this bad.

Wearing a brace and resting the wrist has delayed this week's pages somewhat (it's hard to concentrate), but not horribly so. The next few steps in the process involve a keyboard, and will be much worse. I use my right hand to hold the stylus, but for selecting tools and everything else, I need my left. It's hard enough typing this entry; I do not look forward to 20 more hours of having to hit CTRL+H and ALT+2 every five seconds.

There are four particularly awesome pages are on the way, but they are going to be late. In fact, I think I'm going to knock off early tonight from work and go prop the stupid thing up.

It's entirely possible that I'll be updating on the 9th, and that's my birthday. That isn't so bad--we can have an INTERNET PARTY!

Peeves!

I am ready for the following three Internet behaviors to not happen anymore:

1. Replacing "y" with "eh" to make words like "Kitteh" "Bunneh" and so on. Girls think this is cute. It isn't. I consider it to be a Hello Kitty version of Goatse.

2. Beginning a sentence, most often a reply to a previous LJ comment, with the word "Actually." The smarmy Hermione-like tone of it drives me mad no matter how well-intentioned the comment itself might be. I, too, fell into the habit of abusing "actually" on the net, until I realized how much it pussified my sentences.

3. Webcomics I enjoy starting over 5 times and then going on permanent hiatus. This is one of my long-standing peeves, and will always occupy a top-three position on any list of complaints I might author.

...

Actualleh, my own webcomic did start over once (in a sense), so I guess I'm not completely innocent in this.

More Advice For Bad Writers

I hate how every cool, competent female character I used to admire on TV turned out to be a helpless little wisp of a thing hiding her vulnerability behind a tough-as-nails disguise to escape from the pain of her tragic past.

Writers, if the idea of genuine independence is too threatening for you, go find a different character type to play with! Demolishing a heroine's personality just so a big strong male lead can come along and replace it is such pathetic wish fulfillment.

Happy Fifth of July!

Folks, we just hit the four page update mark for this weekend's Kagerou.

Normally I shift any donations after Tuesday toward the next week's pagecount, but I haven't actually begun pencilling anything yet, so I don't mind. It does mean I've got a lot of work to do in the next couple of days, but I always loved dancing to the Masochism Tango. So it's all good.

Playing FFV Advance has transformed my left wrist into a tangle of molten agony. It hurts just typing this entry, which means the July 4 celebration post is just gonna have to wait, along with the much-delayed trip journal for Akon and Animazement.

Also: I turn 27 on the 9th. THAT'S PRACTICALLY BIG-KID TIME!

Happy Bad Tattoo Day!

I hate to break it to you, Olivia, but you're a terrorist.


See? God does have a sense of humor!


I think we all remember where we were and what we were doing the day the flaming spider-skulls attacked.


Stay tuned for the sequel to this tattoo: My Little Coverup!


I don't know what this bald eagle did to deserve life without parole, but his new gang tat is the talk of Block C.


Ladies and gentlemen, please fasten your seatbelts. The Boeing Freedom is now departing from gate 911.


This skin rip is a classic optical illusion. Flag or dick? Flag or dick?


What bird flu really looks like.


The official flag of the People's Republic of NOOOOOOOOOO~! The same artist later went on to design the 2012 Olympics logo.


And I'm TooDisheartened to go on.

One Piece Dub Cast Voice Samples

Voice actor clips! I'm not sure I like the Luffy voice, but otherwise I think they did pretty good. Usopp and Nami in particular strike me as excellently matched.

The best thing is that the voice samples for Sanji all seem to involve him calling somebody "Titties" and "Funbags." Methinks someone had a lot of fun finding appropriately perverted dialogue to share.


Okay, so I'm a fanboy. Fuck off, you :)

One Piece Dub Cast Announced

The voice talents for the main cast of One Piece have been announced.

Luffy: Colleen Clinkenbeard (Riza Hawkeye from FMA)
Nami: Luci Christian (Wrath from FMA)
Zorro: Chris Sabat (Armstrong from FMA)
Usopp: Sonny Strait (Hughes from FMA)
Sanji: Eric Vale (Kimblee from FMA)
Chopper: Brina Palencia (Nina Tucker from FMA)
Robin: Stephanie Young (...SHE'S A MYSTERY ACTRESS!)

It appears that everyone but Robin played a major role in Full Metal Alchemist. Oh, gods, I hope they cast Travis Willingham (Roy from FMA) as Crocodile. Just because it'd be hilarious, in an unintentional slash sort of way.

I have NO idea whether the FMA dub cast is any good. I only saw the first two eps in English.

Not that it even matters. I plan to buy the DVDs when they come out, and as long as the dub doesn't sound like THIS, I'll be fine: